What is this place?  Scream it top of lungs.  Scarring throat.  Falling prostrate at the wayside.  Crawling in vegetation off the blacktop.  Rats racing uninterested.  Can’t blame them their self-induced ignorance.  Safety net.  No longer homogenized, run into the woods.  Illusional technological reality quicker than the eye.  Magicians disguised as judges and juries.  Ruling law, resonant energy vibrations.  What do you see? Doesn’t matter this disbelief.  Validation, respect, gratitude flourishes inside; lucky to be alive.  All that is left… to be reborn.  Abated breath.  Waiting… to track the disguised.  My murder buried in the sweet earth.  Will find you, will find all of you.  A personal bridge between this world and the other side.

Plastic reality inhabitants- your premise is wrong.  Faked news, government actors, unholy experimenting scientists, military directors, wealthy owning them all. Money, mammon inside and out throughout time.  Programmable organic computers walking and talking daily working and dying.  Ground troops as pawns. In a cosmic game of chess.  Hearts aching to drink, but turning away fluttering. Small white moth reminiscent of resurrection.  Nationalized passion synthetically strong.  Americans apathetic in their beds.  Don’t think anymore… did they ever think?  Intravenously fed.

Stepped into the eye of my own hurricane.  ‘You are never to go there’ a voice said, power source unimaginable.  Falling in focus.  Off balance half in, half out of center. Buffeted stillness.  Know thyself.  Lawbreakers eventually become human.  In the end they all die.  Time does not finish crime.  Evil is tattooed, embedded in hearts… on the walls of internal organs.  Forsaken frequency of prayer.  Kneel for a miracle, listen.  Hearing, ‘Let me show you how…’  Forbidden power apprehended.  Trees manifest as tall angels.  Extensive roots, moving on the ground seeking justice. Sacred, ancient boulders, rocks rolling, crushing conquering- So be it, Amen.


‘The Hundredth Monkey’ a book by Ken Keyes, Jr. is based on the Japanese monkey, Macaca Fuscata.   Young monkeys learned from a wise mother to wash their food between 1952-1958.  After the hundredth monkey learned to wash their food, scientists found by evening the entire tribe; (even those far over the ocean, at Takasakiyama) also began cleaning their food.   The Hundredth Monkey Phenomenon means that a small amount of animals/people may learn something new, but they create an ideological break through or critical awareness communicated from mind to mind instantaneously for all of mankind.  Maybe if enough people read this blog, everyone will  comprehend what the Network is.

Last night felt and heard the tapping on my aluminum head gear which woke me from sleep.  Wasn’t scared at all.  I’ve been educating myself nonstop as of a month ago.  There are many directed energy weapons out there in use.  One of these is called ‘The Touch of God.’  Which utilizes condensed microwaves to mimic the touch of a finger on skin or or as in my case, tapping an aluminum helmet.  (At which point I yelled, “What are you, in the second grade or something?  Just leave me alone.  You bullying cowards make a game out of torture, rape and murder.  I’ve read about the Touch of God Machine.  Leave me alone!”)  Sometimes when you yell they do leave you alone.  There were many expletives involved which I did not add for the sake of being civilized in a blog about torture.

I wake up after a horrendous night and stumble outside in the morning to see beautiful flowers and trees.  Or go out at night to see the stars in the sky. Sometimes flee the house from harsh targeting in day time and go to a store… see people innocently talking with their children, or smelling fruit to pick from a table. It seems so impossible, but targeting it is happening to me and hundreds of thousands of Americans.   BiggerThanSnowden.com has eight short profiles of professional people being targeted by directed energy weapons and gangstalking.

There are DEW’s that are called ‘voice to skull’ one of them being ‘The Voice of God.’   Not to be confused with brain/computer interface machines where live conversation can be heard from the experimenters microphones.  Hollywood has assisted in producing pornographically violent images that can be projected into people’s head through DEW’s.  And then there is the ‘Puke Machine,’ which when trained on a person causes instant prolific vomiting.  Our tax dollars have been put to good use by the CIA, FBI, NSA and our military.   OUR TAX DOLLARS!

As for me, the past week has been extremely harsh in the targeting of my stomach. Urination is becoming quite difficult because of this; sorry but must document for posterity.  As an herbalist, and healthy person am doing everything to combat the constant onslaught of microwaves being used to harm me.  Thank you for reading. Please share if you have twitter or face book so Americans know what is happening in our country.  Thank you.



The brain is the last physical frontier.  Most people consider their brain to be a private place, the last bastion of self.  With earthlings voluntarily interfacing with their televisions, computers, cell phones, i-Pods,  smartphones, radios and tablets a loss in awareness of one’s surroundings, influenced by frequencies affecting the physical brain is not that uncommon of an experience.  Tempus Fugit (time flies) when one is zoned out.  How much does the average person believe in themselves? How much do you believe in yourself?   When you read autobiographies of people living through horrendous events, many times the survivor indicates that through sheer belief they were able to live, while those around them died.  How does one believe in oneself totally and absolutely?  A person will never know how until tested.

If you believe in God; do you believe in yourself first and then God?  Or do you believe in God first and then yourself?  My own answer changed throughout life depending on what was happening at the time.  However as parents we understand it is very important for children to believe in themselves first, and then their parents.  Otherwise the child could become physically or mentally dependent upon their parents as adults.  Autonomy is a good thing if it goes hand in hand with self-belief, not just rebellion.   Many religions claim we are created in God’s image,  with the spark of God within each and every one of us- or we would not support our body otherwise.  This ‘spark’ say religions is the soul.

Nothing can touch the soul.  It is perfect at all times regardless what happens to the physical body it houses.  The hundreds of gangstalkers I’ve been privileged to see over a period of four years have an energy around them of subjugation.  If a soul is ‘lost’ it is still within the body providing the energy to support it; however the brain of this person has turned away from their own light.  The light of God.  God by any other name is the One God.

I believe with all my heart that most gangstalkers were manipulated into joining. Some supposedly indoctrinated by parents.   Are they ‘saved’ by leaders, similar to cults where total and absolute allegiance is given- after these people are picked out of some horrible life or misfortune.  These ground troops usually have new black cars, of every shape and size with black tinted windows.  The few gangstalkers seen outside their cars are very defiant when you ‘watch’ them.  They look at you as if you are the most hated person on earth; as if you deserve what they are paid to do to you.  They are very proud and loyal for the most part, and yet the grey energy I see around each and every one of them implies some form of defeat.  From what is written, the only way out of the Network is death.  If you have a spouse or loved one NOT involved in the Network they too can be prey if the commitment of the subordinate is broken.  I’ve seen pregnant gangstalkers, and fathers with their children, shirtless highly tattooed renegades, chain smoking bleached blondes and mothers with children in laundromats…    on and on.  Interestingly many speak on their phones as if I cannot hear talking about their target.    Most look like they have survived hellish lives. Very few have I seen are young affluent people involved perhaps for the thrill of it.

The United States huge covert Network involves our country’s wealthy; members of government; members of military; members of ‘authorities’ such as utility workers, fire and police. And we cannot forget the experimental researchers; and invisibly clad Network members who think they are gods.  All the above subjugate the ground troops; as well as their targets.

Awoke last night at about 3 am from a picture flashing through my brain of a man sitting at a computer looking straight at me, pressing a button on the computer, then saying, “you’re in.”  Does this mean the 3-4 hours of sleep last night gave them time to totally interface my brain on their computer after weeks of them work?  Sounds ridiculous doesn’t it?  I wish it was.  We are allowed knowledge of the toy helmets on the market that move small cars with brain waves.  From reading- those of us experimented on eventually are totally interfaced.  What does this mean to me?

I am more ‘open’ minded then ever.  Oops another good pun… after finding ‘BiggerThanSnowden.com’ site and being brave enough to acknowledge what is happening to me even though it sounds crazy.  In the past three weeks heard total conversations in my brain while subjected to the worst torture imaginable from microwave and electromagnetic pulse weapons.

I cannot become alarmed by hearing these conversations; because this is my brain!  If I become afraid of my own brain, am lost.  This no doubt is what they want.

So by looking at it logically, realize the less thought the better off I will be.  To just exist would be the most prudent form of ‘action’ to take.  ‘Be in the present’ as a most beloved relative likes to say.  All I can trust is my breath prayers.  Nothing else inside my brain will be allowed to be relevant again.  The fact that I write my thoughts daily to help other targeted individuals is a blueprint in and of itself.   But by helping others, help myself- no matter how they use what I write.

As a psychic I know we on earth are never alone.  Never.  Our angels are always present.  Those of our family passed before us come around.  God’s spark inside us is accessible at all times if we look to God.  Every member of the Network is watched.  It may be a covert organization but what they think they are doing in secret is knowledge throughout the universe and beyond. My next door neighbor whose lone red car occupied her drive until renters of the red brick house left at the end September now has multiple visitors coming and going daily.  She also has a ghost living in her home.  It amazes  me that she can believe in this ghost (that can move blankets from beds to new locations,) but is not afraid of the spiritual repercussions of what she is doing, and how God and the angels view her.  Anyone can be bought, but you cannot buy your way into love.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.  I love you God.


The last two nights have had about four hours sleep total.  Directed energy weapons on my stomach nonstop. must have done something the Network considers ‘wrong’ recently…  because at one point electrocution so bad, felt my stomach would literally rip open.  The most horrible feeling.

Brain computer interface going on both nights also.  Am detached as listening to conversations going on in my brain between my subconscious self and the experimenting Network researchers now situated in neighbors two-story yellow brick house.  These last two nights when  intense torture was happening my neighbor’s car was gone, perhaps she cannot ‘stomach’ intense torture.  Good pun eh?

Instead a white truck delivered a man in light blue dress shirt and dark suit pants who got out and went into the back door with a satchel.   Then another man got into the truck and drove it away.  This truck is always present during the two nights of intense torture.  Since posting neighbors ‘visiting’ car license plates, they have not been back.  The man in white truck delivers experimenters.

This morning sorry to say, but for posterity am documenting, urine smelled like it came out of a urine bag at a hospital.  (Volunteer Candy Striped four summers in highschool at St. Louis Barnes Hospital Complex spent two summers transporting wheelchair bound people with urine bags.)  I know what they are doing to me is killing me.  It is an odd feeling to go home after spending hours each day at library writing this and know that at night I will be baked and fried by illegal, directed energy weapons.  In the daytime the assaults are less intense energy at home,  but hurt and harm non-the-less.  Have no where to go, the Network is there.  Have done everything humanly possible to help myself.  Am watching my own slow murder. With no help in sight.

In old news  Popular Science magazine an article by Clay Dillow August 24, 2010 reports on an ‘experimental’ microwave device called ‘Raytheon’s Assault Intervention Device’ that was installed in Pitchess Detention Center in California to ‘bring the pain’ when 65 prisoners in dormitory housing misbehave.  The device; mounted on a high wall penetrates the skin, but ‘does no damage.’  A similar device was used in Afghanistan but was recalled to the states.  It is a machine 3′ by 3′ by 6’tall.  Definitely not hand-held.

In more old news… the New Scientist, David Hambling explains that Mob Excess Deterrent Using Silent Audio (MEDUSA) uses ‘a beam of microwaves to induce uncomfortable auditory sensations in the skull’ and ‘exploits the microwave audio effect in which short microwave pulses to rapidly heat tissue, and cause shockwave inside skull detected by ears.’  MEDUSA can also cause brain damage from high-intensity shockwave of microwave pulse.

At one point last night, awoke to feel intense heat going into left ear and it felt like something was dripping out of ear hole.  God only knows what they were pinpointing there. When I am asleep wonder just what programming is going on in my brain.  Today in a meditative state heard the voice of my angel say; “No one can make you do anything you do not want to do.”  That is what I have believed my whole life.

My angel’s voice I know.  These other voices of interrogators and researchers are new as of brain computer interface rape and interrogation a month ago.  After I was raped in the hotel with directed energy weapons heard a voice at the end that was a former boss.  He said in a very contemptuous voice, “I made you who you are.”  When started working at my former employers was already an artist and journalist, a Medicine Woman and an herbalist.   No one but God made me who I am.

More old news:  In a Washington Post article from 1-14-2007 on ‘Electronic Harassment and Voices in the head, “An academic paper written for the Air Force mid-1990’s mentions idea of weapons using sound waves to send words into people’s heads.’ ‘The signal can be a ‘message from God’ …’  In 2002 the Air Force Research Lab patented sending microwaves into skulls as words.  The patent was based on human experimentation. ‘In October of 1994 the Air Force scientists were able to transmit phrases into the heads of their human subjects.’  Just think of the weapons we have today.

On a lighter note.  I did ‘see’ an invisibility suited coward again yesterday.  Was sitting in my back yard in the cool morning drinking my coffee.  Saw what looked like a heat ‘mirage’ wavering above my six foot tall slat wood privacy fence.   In back of this fence my chain link fence secures the yard for dogs.  At the same time the mirage was visible, birds were startled and flew away.  I guess the guy jumped onto the top of the chain fence and leaned against the privacy fence.  Then I heard a metallic clink.  (If you remember: heard running on a relatives roof the footfalls were light weight and metallic.  As if this suit uses some type of ‘thrusters’ to leap onto roofs; or move fast barely touching surface.)

Then I remembered sitting on the same house’s front porch one night saying the Rosary, too baked/fried from directed energy weapons to sleep.  Saw the same ‘heat mirage’ on a very cool night at about 3 am.  This mirage appeared on a neighbors lawn to the left, across the street.  I said in a regular speaking voice looking directly at the mirage, “Coward.”  Then heard movement on the grass to the front door of house.  I heard door open and shut; but  no one exited or entered. Knew then that the ‘mirage’ is a signature of invisibility suit movement.  To make invisibility material scientists bend light around the surface of the suit.  Why would you not then see this ‘heat mirage’ while the suit was in action.  So that is good to know. You can see outlines of suit and it’s mirage.  Thank you for reading.  Share on Twitter and Face Book as I have never had either.  Thank you again.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.

Roberta Blackgoat  1918-2002, lived on Big Mountain a Navajo reservation in Arizona. Roberta believed the Mother Earth’s coal was her liver.  The water her blood.  She said that uranium was the Mother’s lungs.  In ‘Forgotten People’ Roberta is quoted as saying, “All the suffering going on in this country with the tornadoes, floods and earthquakes is carried on the breath of Mother Earth because she is in pain…They are trying to take her precious guts out for money. ”   This peaceful, holy woman spent her life protecting the rights of her people.

Most United States citizens believe that they have rights.  The right to free speech is so important.  But people are being murdered, tortured, harassed, intimidated, raped and brainwashed because they have spoken their minds.  How does this make us any different from Putin’s Russia?

After I burned every shred of evidence and bargained with my former employer the targeting did not stop.   In fact got worse.   Realized had been a fool.  Having evidence is one of the most important aspects of survival a targeted individual can have.  One of the pieces of evidence located again was the brochure on ‘How to Spot a Terrorist at Work.’   Former employer handed it out in 2009 after I published poems on a website about the truth of 9/11.

In ‘The EveryDay Concerned Citizen;’ post ‘NSA Whistleblower Karen Stewart says Intel Community Now Full Of People More Dangerous to Freedom than ISIS,‘ this highly intelligent woman is being gangstalked and targeted too.  Believe she is also in BiggerThanSnowden.com.    Am grateful to read about people’s assaults by their former employers, knowing someone else has had similar experiences makes me feel ‘normal.’  That sounds ridiculous but true.  Heard of a man somewhere in Springfield, Missouri being targeted with electromagnetic weapons, but haven’t met  anyone who has yet.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.

who-is-this-bps-manager-of-safety-and-security-operations-at-the-national-headquarters-at-bps1 Brent head of all Security at Bass Pro Shops.

The Springfield News-Leader reported on June 21, 2016 that Bass Pro Shops lost an appeals that Friday, in the U.S. Court of Appeals in the Fifth Circuit in New Orleans regarding an alleged discriminatory lawsuit filed by the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission in 2011.  The EEOC alleges Black, Asian and Hispanic applicants were discriminated against regarding Sections 706-707 of Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.  The alleged discrimination originated from a top official allegedly stating in a Houston store that… ‘It was getting a little dark in here, you need to hire some white people.’  Then a Louisiana store manager allegedly refused a qualified applicant because,’he really didn’t fit the company profile…’  the applicant was black.  The lawsuit alleges Founder John Morris answered questions about racial quotas in a 2004-05 store managers meeting- allegedly saying, “This company will never have a quota system because that’s not the kind of people I want working in my stores.”

In 1983 a friend and I studied Native American Shamanism under a Cherokee tribal Chief, who said we could never tell his stories.  As a child, books on artists and Native Americans were my reading material.  In grade school, interrupted my mother’s ironing to tell her that ‘in my last life’  was a great Native American warrior, a man.  Please understand my upbringing was in a Republican, strict Catholic, three square meals a day, (with all the food groups recommended by the American Medical Association and the Food and Drug Administration;) white, middle class family.   She stopped ironing aghast; “Where did you learn about reincarnation?”  Didn’t know what that word meant, didn’t understand it once she explained it to me.  Told her, ‘just know.’    After the studies ended with the Native American Chief, looked up in the sky one morning to see a cloud in the shape of a giant rattlesnake, scales, tail and all.  Didn’t own a camera at the time.  Called the Chief and he said that Mother Earth was responding to my quest to be a Medicine Woman.  Was excited and honored.

It hurt my heart to learn as a young adult that the ‘reservations’ most Native Americans live on in our affluent country are considered to have living conditions no better than those in Third World countries.  That is what I saw in Israel too.  The ‘Palestinian Territories’ reminded me of our Native American reservations.  I love Israel and I love the United States but to this day we subjugate people in our respective countries.

Psychic ability runs in my family and I channeled this into my perception of Native American Shamanism.  When I stopped going to church every week about 12 years ago continued to say the rosary to my beloved Mother Mary several times a day, and for the past twenty-two years have practiced Native American full and new moon ceremonies inside a Medicine Wheel of rocks collected since the age of seven. Between the two and my breath prayers  feel in touch enough with God to exist on this planet.

Psychic ability runs in my family.  I believe that most of my family has been targeted at one time or another by our government.  Since 1979 the CIA, NSA, FBI, Army Intelligence and Security Command and Secret Service conducted 100 ‘secret’ projects on ESP.   On 11-12-2015 in Newsweek Magazine an article, ‘Meet the Former Pentagon Scientist Who Says Psychics Can Help American Spies,’ it reports CIA and NSA funding of psychokinesis experiments, remote viewing and ESP studies  were spurred on by the Soviet Union’s interest in psychic spies.  The Air Force, Army, Defense Intelligence Agency and Congress bankrolled and protected these programs, though some considered them worthless.  Army’s Fort Meade in Maryland became a secret psychic operational home.  Then in 1995 Congress asked the CIA to cancel or take over these programs.  Most were shut down. Now outside funding by wealthy people continues some of the research.  One huge pharmaceutical empire ‘BIAL’ owned by Luis Portela, funded ESP projects run by Edwin May in California. (From 1985-1995 May served as research director of the Pentagon’s ESP program in California.)  Portel has said, he tries to comprehend why humanity and religion ‘accept too easily some phenomena, so-called mysteries or miracles, ‘ while scientists ‘denied those phenomena, claiming they did not exist.’  Now the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA) is investing millions of dollars in the Neural Engineering System Design (NESD) program to interface brains with computers.

Worked as a newspaper reporter in Arkansas for ten years, and interviewed a man running from the government.   He had apprenticed under the best U.S. Vietnam War sharpshooter.  This sharpshooter claimed he used an ‘entity’ that enabled him to see like a hawk hundreds of feet away.  He never missed a shot.  After the war ended he was detained at a military base.  This man was told he would not be released until he told the military how to contact and  work with the ‘entity.’  The military told the sharpshooter that his ‘entity’ would be used as a ‘secret’ weapon.  The man eventually escaped and lived in the Ozarks in an abandoned cabin.

During this time, the young man I was interviewing met him accidentally in the woods and the sharpshooter taught him how to access the entity.  Before his apprenticeship was completed the sharpshooter fell ill.  He told his young friend that two black helicopters without any sound flew over his cabin and sprayed some kind of chemical.  Within a week he was dead.  The young man said the government then approached him and wanted him to work with them and the ‘entity’ to create the perfect weapon.  He declined the offer. After I talked with him, he and his family, literally hopped into their car loaded with luggage and got out of town, leaving their home behind.  That was in 1991.  I don’t think the government’s interest in psychics has waned any since then.

FOX News was always playing in the break room where I worked for twenty years. A FOX News lawyer Mark Anthony, wrote a book about his psychic ability, ‘Evidence of Eternity.‘  It is great.  He tells about being besieged by ‘dead people’ on almost a daily basis, wanting to get messages to their families.  He is accredited, well-known and believed.

Been thinking about why my eyes were targeted so much.  I have the ability to see ghosts since childhood.   These living beings exist on different frequency.  If my eyes and brain can see frequencies outside the ‘norm’ then perhaps that is why I had the unfortunate ability to see those invisibility suits before our government wanted us to know about them.  The light bending qualities of these suits were detected by my naked eye twice at night and once during daytime hours.  What better way to ensure I never see them again but to target my eyesight?   Or were they targeting my pineal gland, some call the ‘third eye’ to cease all psychic ability?

When angry I speak to those targeting me.  Their listening devices have invaded my home and phones for four years.  When taking flash shots with a camera at night I hear the cowards on my roof startle to the point of almost falling off.  When really angry would grab my antique wooden baseball bat and head outside into my back yard at night to hear them run up the roof.  (Men with illegal directed energy weapons in fear of a woman with a baseball bat?)  This is why they are cowards. They have targeted me and I believe some of my family in three states.  They stay in their homes and hide while intimidating, torturing and maiming.  Or they can maneuver invisibly with illegal weapons.  They are cowards.

But if a person were able to hit an invisibly suited coward with a baseball bat in their home, or inside property behind fences- that suit wouldn’t be protection at all.

Finally realized neighbor in the yellow brick house was part of Network.  Saw her in a supermarket parking lot sitting in her car, and went straight to her point blank to ask if she thought the gangstalkers would kill me?   She almost couldn’t hide how she felt about me so unexpected a meeting.  She had always pushed herself as a fake-friend.  Caught off guard she responded foolishly, “I don’t think they want to kill you. I think they will stop after the elections.”   After the elections they didn’t stop.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.  I love you God.  So be it.  Amen.


After being targeted for two months believe myself to be dying.  There are five stages of death.  First is denial.  Don’t want to believe someone is torturing and experimenting on me.  That is irrational.  So, did everything rational.  Called Springfield City Utilities, (it had to be an electric wire.)  Called Fire Department for a safety home inspection…  Bought an EMF reader because no responder called for help had an EMF reader supposedly.

Under advisement of Russel from City Utilities, ‘grounded’ my home.   Two six foot long copper rods on two sides of house connected with wire did nothing to alleviate electrocution.  Still refused to believe I was being assaulted by what the kind ‘grounder- man’ told me were microwave or electromagnetic wave weapons.  Still  trouble believing it, how could so many people be lost or evil?  How can Americans be so asleep?

Next stage of dying is anger.  Dog-gone-straight was I angry!    Health-nut my whole life, eating with ceramic or wooden utensils because could ‘taste’ metal.  My tiny dorm-room style refrigerator way back in the fireplace room away from kitchen because just the buzz of electricity was jarring to me.  ANGRY, because here I was wrapping my body and head with aluminum foil, (aluminum replaces the copper in the brain and is considered to be the primary cause of Alzheimer’s. )   Aluminum blocks microwaves. Kept buying more and more products to stop the electrocution with directed energy weapons, I didn’t believe in… with my credit card.  Angry to be acquiring debt.  Angry to be in such pain.  Terrible, horrible pain.  Angry to be hurt all the time by cowards hiding.

Then in my next stage of dying, started bargaining...  actually wrote the founder of my former work place a letter, begging him to stop any surveillance of me.  Told him was sorry if sometimes I was mean while standing up for myself and my work injuries against a large corporation.  (Guilt has always run high among Catholics.  My Jewish friend said, “Jewish people are born feeling guilty and Catholics are taught to feel guilty.”  We laughed, but agreed.)  Wrote that burned all evidence- kept diaries my whole life.   Burned in fireplace twenty years of diaries about work.   Gutted all files on personal computer.  Stacks of doctors reports on work injuries burned. Unemployment papers, their lawyers dishonest work, letters written to supervisors…   I really believed that if God and the angels saw me burning all the evidence that could be used against my former employer, surly I would be forgiven by the founder of my former work place for whatever he believed I had done wrong.   

In this letter even wrote I would move out of town to get on with my life if he wanted.   Thanked my former employer as usual (always thanked bosses for my job) for the twenty years with the company.   Then sealed the letter in envelope marked “private and personal.”   Took a large, favorite old mermaid painting off the wall, and attached the letter to the back of it.  Delivered both to the corporate offices of my former employer here in Springfield, Missouri.  Signed the ledger as a visitor, noting I had delivered a gift.   Never heard back.  The targeting with electromagnetic weapons never wavered… in fact got worse.  The bargaining did not work.

Within the week visiting relatives.  Targeted harder then in my own home, due to proximity of neighbors and hiding places.  (Never told the family there out of fear for them, to keep them safe.)   When alone in their house heard footfalls sounding like metal cleats touching lightly, running ON THE FLAT ROOF OF THEIR HOME.   Talk about awkward visits trying to hide aluminum hats worn to bed every night, or attempting to hide the foil around stomach under clothes.   After a particularly bad night was so sick from targeting, next morning called my former employer a week after dropping off gift.  Asked for president of the company.  Knew his secretary.  We talked- my former ‘friend’ (the president) was busy.

Said to her, “Please ask him to make the gang stalking stop.”  She asked what that was?  Said didn’t know myself until just days ago while researching on the internet and tried to explain it to her.   Said also… “I’m now being targeted with Directed Energy Weapons.”   She asked what that was?   Told her- didn’t know myself until Googling it days ago.  Tried again to explain.  She asked who was ‘targeting’ me?   I said, “Allegedly my former employer.”   Silence.   So I asked her who she thought could be stalking me four years after filing a workers injury for medical help?   Then asked who she thought could be assaulting me with energy weapons?   She didn’t know.  We said goodbye.   Heard nothing back.

Became upset back home because targeting so high, anything attempted to do in my own home was almost impossible.  From painting a picture, cleaning, boxing up things to give away, or sell…  had to be accomplished in pain, sizzling, shaking, taking every ounce of energy out me.   Did I really want to sell a home that was paid for?   Once again called the Springfield City Utility asking for help with the lights that flickered (hoping to learn more about my electrocution.)   Russel came back to check out wires, and bravely asked Russel what happened ‘to the poor girl,’ he had said was being electrocuted in Springfield.   No answer.  An hour later got a call from my former employer’s head of security Rodney Toms-  didn’t see his message for days.

Rodney Toms and I played phone tag until we finally talked.  Rodney, had no idea why he was asked to call me by the corporate head of security- Brent  Rodney was sorry he hadn’t called sooner- but his child has been ill.  He genuinely sounded like a good man, and innocent.  Told Rodney would be happy to meet with him, the company president, the founder and two women I knew in security there… to discuss what was happening to me.  He asked why I wanted one of the women mentioned?   I trusted her.   Rodney said he would call back, but never did.

After electrocution that seemed deadly lasted three days non-stop…  called Rodney of security and wondered if that meeting would ever take place?  Rodney said he had not asked anyone to the meeting, because he didn’t think any would come.   I inquired if he had been told yet why he was to call if it wasn’t for a meeting?   Rodney said he found out because of ‘some letter.’   I asked if he had been told the letter was attached to very big gift?   He said no.  Then exasperated he asked “What is this all about?”  Suggested he talk with Brent, and find out what kind of company he worked for.   Or I could drop paperwork at corporate for him.   He said no.

In the last two weeks have accepted the reality that my former employer has paid the Network to kill me.  (Or maybe it was just Brent- head of all security, acting on what he believes is best for the firm?)  I accept the fact that their targeting will kill me.

It helped to stumble on a site for TI’s and find out while leaving a message there, that I could have a blog of my own on WordPress.  When you are being tortured it helps to have a voice.   Once my site was up and running called Rodney back and left message about “targetedartist.wordpress.com.”   He must have gotten upset after reading my site.  Probably called Brent.  Brent must have called a buddy at the Springfield Police Department.   Carlos Curly.

There was a message from a policeman on my land line.  Found it days later as usual. I was to come and meet the Officer at the station to talk.  His voice sounded like a good old boy.  He said- my former employer did not want me to send any more ‘letters‘ (only sent one attached to a gift) or call them (they asked me to call.)   Tried to reach the police officer, but the number recorded was only a station number, not a detective’s office. So got in my car.  It could only go twenty miles an hour, after being tampered with. Reduction in speed happened the day after handing reports all over town about targeting in Springfield, Missouri by my former employer.

Arriving at the Springfield Police Department took a long time, flashers flashing so people would go around.  The station closed five minutes earlier, at 4:00 pm.  Just so happens a very kind man emerged and he attempted to call the Officer.   Evidently Carlos Curly was not a detective, but worked at the firing range.   The kind officer took my name and said he would email the Officer to let him know I came by. Thanked him for his kindness and left.

Wondered if I could be arrested for giving a former employer a gift and for answering messages left by Rodney my former employer’s security man?   It doesn’t really matter, nothing really matters when you are being tortured to death.  I accepted whatever would come out of it.  Made peace with my death.

(Nothing ever did come of the policeman’s call.   Must of been all intimidation and harassment.   After writing this blog never heard from the firing range Officer.   A buddy of Brent the head of all security at my former work place.)

On NPR this morning listened to interview with the new High Commissioner for Human Rights at the United Nations, Zeid Ra’ad Al Hussein.  He is from Jordan.  The interview turned to the subject of torture.  Zeid said there was no exception for the use of torture under any conditions, no matter who the criminal was.

Since I am law abiding, hard working, and a patriotic U.S. citizen, as well as an artist and poet… this ‘no torture’ law applies to me too.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.  I love you God.

First time in my life, took yoga at a wonderful learning facility in Springfield, Missouri.  A gift from a relative.   Loved it.  The last two classes; I was targeted!  It is very hard to do sit-ups while being targeted at home, but even more difficult holding a pose in yoga while shaking with electrical/microwave energy.  The next week in class it happened again.   Quietly got out of class and went to the facility’s glass door looking out front of the building into the parking lot.

Immediately a dark-haired woman emerged from a car looking straight at me.  The expression on her face was one of gloating with a really terrible smile.   If I had to expound would say she looked like a demon.  Went back inside my class figuring since I saw her, and could identify her, she would leave me alone.    But no.  Five minutes later, targeting resumed.  Got up quietly, and there the woman was talking with a man in the reception area,  six feet on the other side of the wall where I was in class on a yoga mat.  Her black purse lay stretched out at both ends by something long and pointy inside it, was on the glass coffee table.  One sharp end of the purse pointed in the direction exactly where I had been on the other side of the wall.   When I asked the woman at the desk on the way out, ‘That woman at the table, think I know her… is she going to take a class here?’ The receptionist said, ‘She will be starting a private class.’   Sadly,  never went back.

Was offered a visit by relatives this summer, with a free plane ticket.  It was all I could do to get on that plane alive.  Had become quiet ill the weeks before from lack of sleep, nausea from being targeting severely and inability to focus mentally. Stayed with friends recuperating,  then looked forward to getting four hours sleep on the plane.  Once in my seat, and up in the air took pictures from the plane window. Suddenly dropped my camera.  Bent over to retrieve it from under my chair.  Feeling around my fingers touched what felt like a thin bag with a long, round object in it, but couldn’t find my camera. The woman behind me held it up.  Thanking her, took a few more pictures before deciding to sleep.

When I put my head on the pillow leaning up against the window, the plane started vibrating with electrical energy.  Was the plane having difficulty?  Not afraid of plane turbulence, closed my eyes.  Noticed my legs sizzling like they do at night, and remembered the bag with cylinder under my chair.   But what about airport security?!  Did the woman disguise this device to look like a flashlight- like the man who showed me his DEW?  Getting up nerve, reached down again to grab the DEW to hand it over to the stewardess.  Finally I would have evidence!

When I touched the bag, the long device was gone, the empty bag still there.  The woman  behind me said caustically, ‘Drop your camera again?’   She targeted me the entire flight and there wasn’t a thing I could do.   Afterwards the woman and I stood waiting at adjoining gates for our next planes, she watched me the whole time. When I got home from my trip began looking in earnest on the internet to find evidence for everything happening – one website of a targeted individual listed being microwaved on a plane.

How is this possible?  Why are these devices; the size of large flashlights not intercepted?  The FAA and Homeland Security should be aware that these DEW’s exist.   If knitting needles, nail files and box cutters are not allowed on planes, neither should directed energy weapons.

Today, I’m exhausted 2-4 hours sleep total in last three nights.   One thing they do while you are going to sleep is to make your muscles twitch, so that your shoulders jerk or your hands flop.  Never before in my life have I had any of these symptoms of shaking, twitching, burning, sizzling, (brain and organs) rattling till your body wakes you up and electrocution.  Feet and hands Charley-horsing into unnatural positions while attempting to relax, all the whites in my eyes blood red in the morning.  The last two nights the targeting was only on my stomach and it was harsh. Consequently there are traces of blood from my rectum and vaginal cavities.  When they are not targeting my stomach or genitals I do not bleed.

If you go to the site ‘My Life 6 Feet Under Cell Towers’ by Veronica Ciandre from March 20, 2010.  In her first page, paragraphs 4-6 she talks of the same symptoms I am experiencing after four months of targeting.  Ciandre started writing, three months after living under cell towers- I started writing after three months of targeting.  Veronica says, ‘Before three months ago I was healthy, vital and slept like a baby.  Didn’t wake with numb hands and feet, body feeling prickly all night and tingling or vibrating almost all day.  I didn’t spend night after night in a hyper active state as though electricity was running through me.’  She talks of bouts of nausea, heart racing, dizzy spells and inability to focus, and concentrate. Same, same, same with me.

People might find it hard to believe Veronica, but the giant cell towers on the roof of her apartment are evidence they are proof of what is happening to her.   I have no proof.  Was told by a family member I dearly love that “You are crazy…”  and, “…delusional- living in a conspiracy theory.”    Love my family and my friends. Friends hear my story of being targeted with Directed Energy Weapons and do the best they can- but see in their eyes, pity, and fear for my mind.  I have no evidence.   Yet Veronica and I have the same symptoms.  The weapons in my neighbors homes, and on my roof are not seen.

My dog Roxanne died within months from electromagnetic assault meant for me. She was always by my side.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.  I love you God.


If the people of the world unite without the governments telling them who their enemy is this year… their friend the next, without the big companies and wealthy exploiting the environment, and getting away with murder, without the greatest export the U.S. sells- military hardware to both sides in a conflict:  How many gardens could people grow?  How many public schools could teach art, music, health and physical education again?  How many leaps could be incorporated in a dance? How much art could be hung?  How many homes, factories and vehicles built with renewable energy?

Under the National Defense Authorization Act of 2013,  are psychotronic and directed energy weapons allowed to be used against U.S. citizens?

Sarah Kershaw in an article published with the New York Times in 2008 “Sharing their Demons on the Web,’ wrote that Representative Jim Guest from Missouri told the Times, “I’ve had enough calls, some from credible people- professors- being targeted by nonlethal weapons.  They become psychologically affected by it.  They have trouble sleeping at night.”  He helped to bring one of the only cases to court to stop DEW attack on a Missouri resident and his family- by satellite and hand-held DEW’s.   (Yet when I called Jim Guest this summer to ask him for help with my own DEW targeting he said, “That was all a mistake.”  And ended our conversation.)   Sarah Kershaw wrote that if people report they are being targeted ‘…to the police, doctors or family, they said they were often told they were crazy.’

Sept. 14, 2008 Time magazine had an article on ‘The Army’s Totally Serious Mind-Control Project.’  $4 million was given to the U.S. Army in 2008 to create ‘thought helmets.’  Army neuroscientist  Dr. Elmar Schmeisser overseeing the program, said ‘It’d be radio without the microphone…  Because soldiers are already trained to talk in clean, clear and formulaic ways, it would be a very small step to have them think that way.’  The challenge is to pinpoint speech-related brain waves.

Back in 2009 San Francisco-based Emotiv Systems offered a $299 headset as a commercial version of brain wave technology in a toy.

Going back further in time; Chief Justice Burger oversaw the Supreme Court case of CIA v. SIMS (1985:)   Between l953 and l966 during the Cold War, the CIA (funded with U.S. tax dollars) paid for a program called MKULTRA.   Involving research and development of chemical, biological, and radiological materials in clandestine operations to control human behavior.  80 institutions and 185 private researchers participated. This method of experimentation is now expressly forbidden by Executive Order.  It is against the law.

Cointelpro, was the secret war on activists and whistleblowers used by the FBI. Many think MKULTRA morphed into the Monarch program.  Former CIA director William Colby when asked about Monarch said, Monarch ended between late 1960’s and early 70’s.  But did  Monarch morph into the new Phoenix program?  Prison inmates in Atlanta, Georgia in 2011 were exposed to experimentation for 18 months in exchange for lighter sentences.

I like what James Stanley said.  He was a Master Sergeant in the Army at Fort Knox, Kentucky at age 20 when he agreed to test gas masks, not knowing he would be experimented on.  He was among several thousand people the Army and CIA tested. In 1994 Congress voted to redress his case and after 18 years he was awarded compensation for his suffering.  This Korean and Vietnam combat veteran compared his experiences at Fort Knox to the Nazi tests on camp inmates.  He said, “We tried them at Nuremberg… and then turned around and did the same thing… ” in our own country to our own people.

Thank you God for bringing the Network into the light for justice and bringing the Network down to conquer them.  I love you God.  So be it.  Amen.

gangstalker followed everywhere during time off in Hot Springs, Arkansas

A request by 13 U.S. Senators was made to Bass Pro Shops founder John Morris, and Bass Pro Shops President Jim Hagale,  after 21 year old Dylann Roof went into the Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church in Charleston, South Carolina and murdered nine church goers on June 17, 2015.

Roof was allowed to buy a gun while his three day background check was still pending due to a ‘default to proceed’ provision in gun law.  The FBI was notified but no one looked at his police report.  FBI director James B. Comey said, ‘… Roof should not have been able to legally buy that gun that day.’

It has been over a year since Bass Pro Shops founder John Morris and President Jim Hagale, received a letter from thirteen senators asking a change in one gun sale policy as a ‘duty to ensure your products do not get into the hands of dangerous individuals.’  But Bass Pro Shops never responded to the letter or to any inquiry  by newspapers.  The FBI reports 91 of most background checks are completed within minutes in most states.  EZ Pawn in Texas was sent the letter, as was Bass Pro Shops and Cabela’s, (as of Oct. 3, 2016 John Morris/Jim Hagale purchased Cabela’s.)

WallMart joined Mayors Against Illegal Guns in 2008 and agreed not to sell guns without background checks even if three days passed.

In contention is a provision of the Brady Handgun Violence Act allowing firearm sales to proceed if after three days an applicant background check is still pending.  The thirteen U.S. Senators who sent the letter to Bass Pro Shops are; (Conn.) Richard Blumenthal, and Chris Murphy,  (Mass.) Edward J. Markey,   (Ill.) Dick Durbin,  (Hawaii) Mazie Hirono,  (N.Y.) Kirsten Gillibrand and Chuck Schumer,  (Cal.) Dianne Feinstein and Barbara Boxer,  (R.I.) Sheldon Whitehouse and Jack Reed,   (Va. )Tim Kaine, and  (N.J.) Robert Menendez.  No Missouri state Senator put their name on that letter, including Claire McCaskill.   On the other hand (Mass.) Senator Chris Murphy put his name on that letter and went further by saying, “Listen, I don’t think people should be shopping in these stores unless they make a commitment to require background checks before they sell guns.” As reported by Thomas Gounley August 12, 2015 in the Springfield News Leader.

Once my first disability check arrived,  felt brave to tell family what happened to my job of twenty years.  With $1,059 a month coming in, autonomy was intact- wasn’t destitute any longer.  Most were respectful of the over six months of silence but some were angry.   Surprisingly one relative asked if I would accompany them to Israel to help during business meetings, found myself saying ‘yes.’

When I wasn’t praying or working to get help for myself:  watched a foreign movie everyday.  Listening to different languages uplifted my environment, and assisted me in learning new things about our world.   Most of the movies I watched oddly enough were made in Israel and represented both Palestinian and Israeli viewpoints.    A librarian recommended the book ‘My Promised Land’ by Ari Shavit. It was good.   Felt as if God had prepared me for this gift of a visit to Israel.   At the library checked out ‘In Flight Hebrew.’   By studying this CD for a month, I learned enough Hebrew to shop for groceries and make my time there fun instead of awkward.

Even in Israel two men followed me!   One pictured on 10-21-2015 blog was not happy when I aimed my camera at him.  He scowled and turning away but kept following. The other man, a very tall Asian laughed a lot, but disappeared when I tried to photograph him.  That trip was my first time out of the U.S. besides traveling briefly to Mexico.  What a beautiful way to get over twenty years of hard work washed down the drain.   It made me question more than ever, who had the money to pay someone in another country to watch me… and why?  I wasn’t important. What were the watchers keeping track of me for?  I started calling them ‘the watchers.’

Back in the U.S. kept studying Middle Eastern languages at home with garage sale CDs.  All my life, loved Persian carpets and incorporated their designs and patterns in paintings.  According to ‘martinacable99’ at WordPress.com- learning a foreign language and being on disability are two good reasons people get targeted with directed energy weapons;  taken from ‘Monarch-the-New-Phoenix-Program-II.’   But in 2015 wasn’t targeted and didn’t know anything about DEW’s or invisibility suits. Was piecing together what remained of my life after twenty years with one corporation.  Do we really want the United States to ban learning and appreciation of other cultures?  Is someone a terrorist who learns Middle Eastern languages, listens to their music and loves their culture?  NO.

As winter approached settled out of court for hand injuries to pay the extra $100 heating bills.  Paid off debts.   Thought the stalking would stop then.  But noticed the people following became bolder wanting me to see them.  About that time, realized might never work again.  Began to look at my home.  The electricity was 75 years old and barely worked.  With rest of settlement money hired someone to rewire.  Also bought a whole new black wardrobe from Disabled Vets, and Good Will.  Bought five pair of black new shoes to last the rest of my life.  The brightly colored clothing and footwear reminiscent of my ‘former’ life I gave away.  

People asked ‘why all black clothing?’   Told them various reasons, but the main reason I didn’t tell was to be able to hide from the people following me for years.  At that time didn’t know about ‘heat bodies,’  or through-wall radar, or the electromagnetic pulse we all individually make that can be identified by a satellite.   Just thought if they were going to try to murder me by ‘suicide;’ murder me by ‘accident;’ or murder me by ‘natural causes’ I could run and hide to attempt to escape them first.  For other reasons, escape in Missouri is probably not possible.  My former employer owns Springfield, Missouri as well as controls most of what goes on in the state of Missouri.  So would have to run elsewhere.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.  I love you God.

Close your eyes while I pray.  Bless me God, for seeking forbidden truth. Revelations mutating silence. Never believing what society says is good or bad.   Calamitous existence from the beginning.  As a child understood our world cracked-open. Making sacrificial offerings for family and nation.  Living alone with a vengeance to get something done.  Words mightier than swords spilling out of mouth and pen. Now pretending everything is all right.  Watching, eyes wide open, no evidence.  A witness.  Knowing.  Everyone sleeps.  Thank you God, love you God.  Amen.

The surveillance started in 2012 after filing with employer of twenty years for medical help concerning work related hand/arm injuries.  Former employer immediately sent pictures to a security website that runs nationwide.  Businesses use photos to track ‘shoplifters and troublemakers.’  They want live footage.  Everywhere got lots of attention in stores from their loss prevention crews.  Funny at the time.

This is what happened while visiting relatives down south last week:  One night, we made a campfire in the driveway of their four acres.  Roasted organic marshmallows and drank hot chocolate.  Laying back looking up at the twinkling stars, four drones straight above us repeatedly circled, some doing U-turns.  To dark to catch with camera.  My former employer’s store in that state was an hour away.  If it wasn’t them, then tax money was paying for all this with local authorities involved.  Police vehicles followed from the moment I got to town.  Started carrying  a camera everywhere.   They followed inches from my bumper, till I got back on the highway for home.  One cop pulled his car over and watched me get on the highway.   These are all intimidation, harassment tactics.   Was followed the return trip home (231 miles) by an orange Mustang with a black stripe down the middle. Upon exiting at Evans Road in Springfield, Missouri the driver pulled out in front, waving and smiling obnoxiously until turning onto the highway heading back south. Could pick him out of a line up.

Out west at another family’s home, the week before… helicopters hovered repeatedly.  Praying in a secluded area heard neighbors wondering about the helicopters.  A strange man in a black suit and tie, came up to shake hands with me.   Then he got in car and drove away.  Believe he took a photo.  Couldn’t sleep on sofa one night, around midnight moved blankets to a cot in their basement.   Instantly helicopters swooped low over house five times.   In restaurants in this western state diners at adjoining tables used their Smart phones to take video.  They wanted me to know I was always watched.   Believe the neighbors next door to family are part of surveillance as their two cars never leave when visited.   At that time laughingly told two friends I had a ‘fan club.’  Had no idea this was called ‘gangstalking,’ until went to library to research years later.

Two years after filing for medical help was let go because my work injuries would not heal, even after two surgeries.   After twenty years made them a lot of money with my good work ethic.   Was denied unemployment wages by employer.  While waiting for foodstamps  foraged in the 50 by 100 foot city lot my house sits on. Picking up organic apples laying on the ground that fell from trees planted the first year bought my home 1995- eating dock leaves, grape leaves and dandelion leaves in salads.   Peach leaves for tea.   My ‘yard’ is a huge garden of herbs, fruit and flowers, now overgrown.  Glad this yard sustained me when I had nothing.

Did not tell family when my job ended.  They would have given lots of advice (as scared people do) and insist I stay with them (as people who love you do.)

Focusing was not easy.  Always having one or two jobs, working hard- NEVER had unpaid bills.  Panic from destitution pressed in.  This went on for months.  At social services standing in hour long lines, and at social security in two hour lines- realized state and federal agencies buried in rules, red tape and regulations. So much tax money spent duplicating procedures and forms people must work with.   I was constantly reciting prayers to God for calm.

Didn’t understand why harassment and intimidation intensified once my former employer let me go.  Found out the insurance agent used by former employer used to work for them.  Went to seek advice from a lawyer who told me the papers I showed him concerning work injuries contained great errors.   Didn’t want to believe him when he said I was being lied too.  Had to get a lawyer.  At deposition with lawyers from former employer, told them I was destitute, without money for some time.

It was odd how suddenly people around me began dropping large bills on the ground.  Or whole rolls of quarters spilled.  The clincher was at the Station Library, when a man sat and put his billfold stuffed with 20’s hanging out, in the small space between our two computer desks- though ten computer desks around us were empty.   He sat next to me two hours watching his wallet.  Then I knew.

My former employer wanted me to do something illegal in desperation to ruin my character.  But I wouldn’t do anything illegal.  When there was a four car accident on the corner of Minota and Campbell where a ‘neighbors‘ big yellow brick rental house sits, I ran out to help.   As usual.  Looked up from a screaming lady and baby,  see blond haired man with glasses eight feet away taking notes on me.  He smiled when I saw him.   Standing by him was a man with black hair videotaping me.  I could identify both of them in a line up.  He had the decency to look down in shame.  Again intimidation and harassment, lack of privacy- stalking.

Five months later kneeling all morning in front of my Grandma’s statue of Mother Mary-  the one that smelled of flowers several times- was astonished by instant, incredible peace and a warm golden light.  Heard clear as a bell; “You will get disability.”  By the end of week was told the same by government officials.

Thank you God for everything exactly the way it is today.